Post-it notes and reality ...

The things about real time blogging is that we tend to forget about the stuff we want to talk about unless we put down notes or stickies that reminds us of the topics proper.

Like for instance I wrote down this little yellow note on my notebook that said "Can this be real?" and promptly imagined that I could remember what it was that I wanted to talk about.

Seriously people.
Can you remember anything with something that generic?
And yet I did.

This is what I am talking about.



For those who does not understand the language.
It says, "Female worker needed between 18 to 30 years old for work in a Spa and Saloon. No experience required, on hand training will be provided. Monthly salary from RM3000 to RM4000. Please call this number"

I have taken the liberty to wipe the number out, just in case those that read this actually ends up calling them to apply for the position.

It would be bad if that happened.

My guess is that this is very attractive to two kinds of people.
The first is the desperate kind where they know its a scam and yet they have no other venues than to try it anyway.
The second is the innocent who actually believes that places like these have payouts that is that high.

Am I implying that a Masseuse could never make that much of money?
Yes and No.
No, I am not saying that a Masseuse will not make a hefty sum if they were true professionals and working is a legitimate establishment. As far as I know the really good ones make much more than the amount indicated in this shabby poster.

Yes, I am saying that any establishment who utilizes resource hiring via a tear off poster in a Bus Stop could not be anything other than a scam to con people into a line of illegitimate activities that could ruin their life forever.

So back to the point where the question beckons.
"Can this be real?"
The pessimist in me yells that its a shady deal that will end badly for everyone.
The pragmatist in me says that I should call the local assemblymen and ask him what in the world is he going to do about this in his constituency.
The Chinese in me says I should mind my own business and go home to my wife.

Answer?
Its not real.
Solution?
I am of Chinese descendant trough and through.
So I resolve to using my blog to warm my fellows humans of these despicable act.
I pray no one ever calls that number ever.
The outcome is so depressing.

Moving on to 2010 ... proper ...

All the new years have passed. :)
Let me rephrase that.

All the new year celebrations have passed.
And I can finally get back into normalcy.

The funny part about this celebrations are that they don't exactly mean the year have truly come to pass but merely symbolized that time have moved on and we should to.

Will try to put some new stuff up soon.
Have been writing stuffs on post-it notes to remind me what I have in mind.
Nothing seem to be sticking to my mind properly these days.
Maybe I am STILL DRUNK from coffee.

I got drunk with Cafe Latte ...

No, you did not read it wrongly.
I actually got drunk with Starbucks coffee.
As I said, before in my previous posting, Cafe latte is one of my common drinks.
Though this is the first time that I actually got drunk over it.

The symptom that manifested after I consumed the beverage is listed below:
1. Hyper active
2. Blabbering gibberish
3. Nose starts to be stuffy
4. Feeling light headed and sleepy

All the above symptom is identical to me being drunk.
And this kind of drunk is from the heavy stuff like VSOP or XO, not your garden variety whiskey or cheap beer.

Maybe I am just getting old.
Or Starbucks is starting to lace their coffee with the good stuff.
I prefer the later.

Happy Lunar New Year ...

Its the second day of the New Lunar Calendar Year.
And I can honestly say that its been a taxing start.
Been driving up and down the state highways making my usual rounds around relatives and friends.
Will be traveling the whole day today as well.

So I thought that I will leave a message here to notify you all that I might not be posting anything new for the whole week due to my congested schedule.

Let the driving begin.

Autobots!!!
Transform and Roll out.

Making it through the day ...

Its harder and harder these days to make it through without going into several phases of denial and frustration.

And I am talking about just decisions on where to eat.

People are constantly asking the same question whenever the clock hit 12PM.

"Where to eat?"

Its a rather benign thing but is important to most people.
That would include people like my wife.

Reason?

They actually enjoy the process of consuming food.

Me? I eat to survive and not the other way round.

The process of getting energy and nutrition in order to continue for more work ahead is what pushes me to get out of my working state to eat.

If I can skip the process, I would.

Does that mean I don't enjoy food?
Nope, I just don't put so much emphasis on it.
I enjoy eating when I am actually putting my mind on it.
Its something that I allocate time to do not something that I need in every single meal.

So its always the same for me when people ask me what to have for lunch.
I merely say "Food".
It irks them to no end.

Bing bang ... its a new year ... again ...

Chinese new year is around the corner and people are busy going around getting gifts and preparing for the festive season.
It would only be appropriate if I were to talk about it here for a little while.
Yet strangely, there is nothing of substance to actually commit written words to anymore.

Yes, its a festival of celebrating the coming of the new year according to the Lunar Calender.
The days that leads to the celebration is actually quite hectic.
Spring cleaning, linens are hung out everyday, stocking up of food and drinks, its practically a preparation for Armageddon.
The children of course is delighted and look forward to a huge collection of "Ang Pow", which basically means more spreading of money to encourage harmony and peace.

Ok. I sound like a CNY scrooge.
Maybe I am just jaded over the meaning for this celebration.

It was different for me when I was young.
Chinese New Year did not mean to me the way it means to others.
The Ang Pows was not a factor for me because we were poor and the packets usually hold only token amount of RM1 to celebrate the occasion.
We did not have lion dances or fireworks galore in our front porch.

Chinese New Year for me was more a practical matter.
It was a holiday where I can spend time at home.
My sister and I would play in the kitchen with Mom cooking up a storm for our relatives and friends that were coming over.
Though we were not rich but Mom insist that we serve the best to our guest.
So they would be simple dishes like Curry Chicken, Stew Pork, Salads and Chicken Soup.
Relatives will come over with some additional food and we will have a gathering of merriness.
And that was what really stuck in my mind after all these years.

With mom's passing 10 years back, the festival is no longer as meaningful as it used to be.
There is no more gathering of relatives and children running making a nuisance of themselves.
No voice of Mom telling me to go clear up the tables for future guests.
Now its just a quiet day in the house watching moving pictures on a glass tube.

There will still be some relatives that come over but not a continuous flood of people.
Some of Mom's old friends might drop by to see how we were doing and such which I appreciate a lot.

Not to dampen the mood too much, it is still a merry festivity.
I am just no longer into it as I used to.

Happy Chinese New Year my friends.
May the year of the Tiger present opportunities for you to achieve your dreams and goals.

Cameras and ruminations ...

Apparently I am human after all.

Just the other day, I was standing in front of an electrical convenience store where there was this advertisement about camera products sold by a famous manufacturer.
The video was about 10 minutes long where several model of cameras was put to the test.

But for the love of life I could not recall what those cameras were and what they were good for, other than one of them was more or less water proof.

The reason?

No, it’s not because I am suffering from acute memory disorder or that a part of my brain was surgical removed to impend a certain evil world domination faction from gathering technologies that will destroy the world.

Rather, it’s quite shallow.

The whole 10 minute presentation was done by bodacious girls in skimpy bikinis and I could not concentrate on what they were saying because my mind of having a fit over so much naked flesh in front of it.

I mean, they were outrageously cute in their swimwear.
And my hormones went into overdrive.

Lewd, I know.
Crude, I agree.
Stupid, absolutely.

And thus, I am very much a normal human male.

The strange part is that it’s not the first time I have seen so much flesh.
The beaches and pools are plastered with it.
But I don't get "distracted" so easily when I am there.
Maybe it’s because there are more than just pretty things.
There are the crying children and playful dolphins that even out the whole naked issue.

Still, man.
I told my wife that I am rather ashamed of my lack of control and that I should strive to be a better man.
You know what my wife said?
"You don't need to do such a thing love. You have the same look when I am changing in front of you. I appreciate the compliment."

Do I have the best life partner in the world?
Yes I do.

I Dreamed a Dream ...

Sharon pointed this to us and I smiled all the way through.

When I was young, my dream had been to fly.
A pilot, an astronaut or just be superman.
That was when I was around 10.

When I was 12 years old, I suddenly decided that I wanted to work with computers for the rest of my life.

Of course those were the days that I dream about creating GAMES instead of business applications. Its not a far cry from what I really wanted.

I actually opted to be a mechanical engineer when I left high school but was unable to take up the course due to scholarship issues and the fact that the school that I was planning to go to folded.

Yes people, the college that I applied to and got a scholarship for went bankrupt.
That's how life treats me when it feels like I needed to perk up.

So I ended up studying computer science in a College in PJ that was using up my family's backup funds for tuition fees. This later on led to me going over to Melbourne to finish my degree as a Bachelor of Science(Computer Science) under the universities scholarship program.

For the pass 12 years, I have been working as a computer developer, coding and building programs for different industries that require expertise like mine.

So, I believe I am considered one of the few lucky ones who actually kept their dream alive by sheer coincidence or as my pastor says, "The will of the Lord".

I of course have more than just one dream.
Actually that's not true, I do have only one dream but it consist of a lot of chapters within it.
And that only a few have come to pass.
I continue to live within that dream.
Some more vivid than others.
But still my own dream.
Doing it my own way.

Dreams don't die a slow death because they are unachievable.
They die because we do not persist upon it.
Yes, life does not feel obligated to help us with our dreams.
But then again, why should anyone bother to help us with OUR OWN DREAMS at all?
Its your dream after all, so shouldn't you be the one that do all the heavy lifting?
Why put the finger on other places when it all comes down to you and what you choose to do.

So before you believe you cant make your dream come true, think again.
It only ends when you decide to end it.
And if you never do, the dream never dies.

You know what?
I actually managed to achieved my dream of flying as well.
My consultation work tend to send me flying around a few years back and it was a much appreciated experience.

Dream your dream and live it by never giving up.

Susan Boyle did not give up, why should you?

Did you know?

I have been spending a lot of time listening to other people’s conversation lately.

This time the conversation is about health and insurance.

The discussion went around the need for medical coverage of all the major illness that strikes us without mercy.
In the insurance world, they more or less classify them as the major 36 illnesses that are claimable under their terms and conditions.
Stuff like cancer, AIDS, trauma and some of the less publicly known (but common) diseases that can affect a person's ability to function normally.

Now mind you, the people that I was overhearing are not of the insurance world.
They are like you and me, which basically means, whatever they know about insurance policy are not entirely accurate if not down right wrong.

For instance, though AIDS is covered, it has several type of Claimable types.
There are independent clauses for "Blood Transfusion" and for "Medical Staff" infections which is on top of a normal AIDS medical coverage.
This of course is also dependent on wheather the policy you purchased lumps it into their 36 illnesses list.

Cancer claims are usually limited to stage 3 cancers only.
If you are in stage 1 or stage 2, your claim is not going to be accepted.
Please note that I am talking about your MEDICAL INSURANCE and not you’re HOSPITALIZATION.
Its two different things all together.
Your hospital stays are still claimable but limited to the daily claimable stated in your policy.
Some insurance agency might cover stage 1 Prostate Cancer but as far as I know it’s not a common practice.

Another less known fact about medical claims is that the coverage is usually only applicable at the country which it was purchased on.
So if you bought your Medical Insurance Policy in Malaysia and you get into a medical condition in say Australia, you’re on your own.
Though some medical card does state that you can use your medical card to seek for assistance in a foreign country, it does not state that it will cover the medical bill that comes with it.
(Which is also why there are such a thing as travel insurance which you need to purchase independently from the insurance companies)

So as I was saying, the two ladies (did I ever mention that ladies talk rather loudly in public areas?) Was going on and on about their medical policies and why they need to get more coverage due to the living environment being contaminated with pollutants and what not. Apparently a coworker of theirs was recently diagnosed with breast cancer and they were afraid of how easy it was to catch them.

From what I gather, their insurance agents should be getting a significant commission increase some time soon.

Grand Children ...

While sitting by the pool side just now enjoying the simple life, I overheard a conversation by two elderly woman.

Apparently they are both grandmothers and were discussing about the plight of grandchildren.

Both of them were complaining that being at their age, they are still not able to live the good life of easy chores and spontaneous high tea sessions.

Their grandchildren have taken up all their free time.

Now that statement alone might not be able to sum up all their grievances.

Their story is not that uncommon among the modern world today.

After caring for their children for 20 years, giving them shelter, love and education. They finally grow up and make a future for them selves both in the working world and their private lives.

Gaining momentum in the corporate ladder they achieve financial wealth by investing their time into the company's vision and products.
As for their private lives, they meet their dream husband/wife and get married.
Soon within a few years, children comes along and they have now painted the modern day dream life.

A successful carrier, a warm family and the promise of future generations to come.

Now I think I would have hit almost every single living human being now with this rubber stamp story.

What is left unsaid though is what kind of stress comes with being both successful at work and at home.

Both husband and wife have their own corporate ladder to climb.
Both husband and wife have their own financial responsibility to fulfill.
Both husband and wife have their role to play within their family.
And both of them are reluctant to give their life for someone else.
This is a very common issue.
Stop whatever argument you have hanging upon your tongue.
Trust me when I tell you that I am saying this without prejudice or judgement.
It is merely an observation of facts.

Most people really don't think about these kind of issue until its standing right in front of them and they can no longer ignore it.
And that my friend is why arguments within family happens.

Lets get back to the two elderly woman's conversation.

They were complaining that they do not have any free time for themselves because their loving children have dump their responsibilities onto the elders. Mainly parents of the baby child have gone to work and the grandparents are left with the diapers and crying baby.

Of course, you will say that the granpa's and grandma's are the ones that told them that they will care for the child while the son and daughter works.

What do you expect them to say?
"I don't give a damn, the parasite was born from you so you take care of your own mess?"
Or course not.
Being loving parents, they will take up your burden as well.
But it does not mean that they don't feel pained over it.

While their friends go on tours and afternoon teas, these old folks are left with more chores and little appreciation.

Children often forget that their parents are human beings too.
Its rather convenient to ignore their feelings when it suits them.

So these two elderly woman while sitting in front of their grandchildren complains and complains about how inconvenient their life has become because of the cub.

I am not sure if babies actually understand all the words flying around.
But according to scientist, babies are able to capture emotions being emitted by their surroundings quite well. And I believe that these two babies more or less felt the kind of resentment being pushed upon them by their caretakers.

As all my postings tend to be, there is always something that I am trying to convey.
Now what is it that I am trying to say here.
The subject is actually, parenthood.

The child that you give birth to is fundamentally yours.
Their future.
Their life.
Their everything is and will always be your responsibility.
No matter how grown up they become, you will always be the one responsible.
No point sugar coating it.
Yes, they are their own individuals.
They have their own thinking patterns.
And they don't need to listen to what you say.
Free will gives them all the power they need to shove you away.
But that does not cut away the bond or the responsibility.
You can choose to be not responsible but you can never deny its existence.

The parent of the baby needs to know that you can'y just leave your child with someone else to care for while you make money.
No matter how valid the reason for doing it, does not make it right.
Your child.
Your duty.
Your choice.

I have always known that if I were to have my own children, one of us will have to give up their careers and care for them. And I have always assumed that the person will be me.

Easy for me to say since I don't have children of my own.
And from my current situation, I don't think I will be having them as well.
But thats not the point.
I had already decided that I would give up my career for the child even before they were born.

Why not the mother?
Isn't it the norm?
I am not sure if the "norm" should be the "norm".
Financial obligations requires us to make decisions.
And I believe that the person who chooses to stay behind to must do so willingly and not forced or coerced into doing it.
Which is why I never assumed my wife will do so.
It does not mean she won't.
Only that I will and I am willingly doing it from my heart.
Whatever happens is because we made a conscious decision and am willing to do it without any emotional baggage.

As for the grandparents of the babies?
You are still a parent.
And you still have responsibilities.
Helping your child care for their child is not a chore.
Its not suppose to make you feel like you just another nanny.
The love and care you give to your child flows right through into your grandchildren as well.
High tea's and tours are nice.
And frankly speaking, just because you have grandchildren does not mean you need to give up your retirement plans.
Just work around it.
You will mostly be surprised on how convenient things are in reality.
If you believe that you feel burdened by that love than I think you need to tell your child that you are no longer able to do this than to contaminate the babies emotional state by treating them as a source troublesome tasks.

Covey tells us that most people actually loose touch on whats important to them when they reach the time of parenthood. Or more specifically they no longer know whats important to them spiritually.

They believe that their individual comfort is more important than their spiritual balance. They make up excuses and reasons that allows them to NOT do things that should be done.

But all this lies eventually serves only make us miserable.
And eventually push us over the edge to become that Ebenezer character.

Know your center.
Understand yourself better.
Build that integrity that you can be proud of.
Do what needs to be done because its important to you.

Maybe you might even find that dirty diapers might make you a betrer person after all.